Everyday Crusades

Joy is still having an endless bout with the religious dude. She gets so frustrated with him, because (like most christians) he doesn't answer any of her questions, (I.E. "Why does your god gamble with lives (like Job), yet christians say that gambling is evil?", "Why is it that God supposedly told Abraham to murder his son (which he was going to do), but whenever people kill in the name of "God", christians say it's just Satan talking to you", and "Do you agree with the passage in the Bible that says if a man does not believe in God, you should kill him, burn his town, rape the women in it, and kill and dismember all their babies?"


You know, the general stuff.

I've noticed that with all heavily religious people. Christians mostly. I may be libeled and have numerous remarks made about this, but it's true. You can't have an honest debate with a christian. It doesn't work. They are SO bent on converting you, that you can show them every contradictory passage in the Bible, and they'll just quote scripture back at you...thinking they've somehow accomplished something. They think the Bible is self-proving...which is also ridiculous. The one thing you always hear is "Because it's in the Bible". Of course. The Bible is truth because it says so.

That's like using a word in its own definition.

Most christians also spend little or no time questioning the reasoning behind the stories in the Bible. They read a story like Job, and they say "What a good man...he has strong faith". They don't say something a rational person would say like "Hey! Why did God just shit all over that guy for no reason except to win a bet with the Devil?! What an asshole!"


The whole point, which I have stated many a time (no, I don't expect them to listen anymore) is easy...

People created God in THEIR image. They created him so they could answer all those questions they had no answers to:

"What happens when we die?"

"How did we get here?"

"WHY are we here?"

These questions are far beyond the realm of human comprehension. Hence, God was born.

1. God created Man, then Woman from Man's rib (subjugation), even though all fetuses begin as female,

2. Then he killed all except Noah's family and 2 of each animal, and they repopulate (inbreeding)

3. God states that out of all his rules, the main ones are DONT DEFY ME, DONT HONOR ANYONE ELSE, and ABOVE ALL, PRAISE ME..."dont kill anybody" ends up in distant fifth place.

4. Charleton Heston looks horrible in a wig.

5. God gets his priorities in order, which are all mostly "Have people worship me", "Get more members", and "Kill those who don't convert"

6. Yul Brenner doesn't need a wig.

Anyway, I'm done for awhile. I just wanted to give a first glance as to what I'm noticing in this world. Christians are like brick walls. I hate to make a generic statement like that, but unfortunatley it's true. I have had 3 (that I can recall offhand) relationships / friendships that have ended in complete ignoring of me, simply because the inevitable happened: I asked questions, they ignored them, they said God was great, I said "But this passage says that _________________, do you think that's right?", they said "I think you're misinformed", I say "I got it from the Bible", they scream "I will pray for you!" and never talk to me again.

Rinse and Repeat.

I'M DONE. I'M NOT DOING IT ANYMORE.

After hearing the endless rants and rampages that Joy has gone on, listening to endless quotes from numerous books and magazines, and reading one-line statistics in random books, nothing has phased me. I'm still a meat-eater. Nothing has gotten through my impervious shield of denial, which so many humans have nowadays. I just said "Wow", and moved on.

Fortunately, I was just hit with the reality stick.

I just watched "Fast Food Nation".
It's not a documentary. So there's no way conservatives can say "Well there's a lot of liberal bias in that." It's a ficticious story about how the fast food mega-corporations, as well as the people of this country, operate on auto-pilot. Deny this, ignore that. Show a flashy sign, make an extra dollar.
The entire movie shows very well how the world, and more particularly Americans, operate on "quick-eating, no time to cook, maybe I'll have some frozen Sausage and mac & Cheese" lifestyles. It was shown believably...which is the most important aspect. You watch this movie thinking "I've seen this happen before" many times.

It was really an eye-opener. But the most compelling was the last five minutes, throughout which, I don't believe I even remembered to breathe. It's the worst thing I have ever seen.

And, as a first for me, I felt something from the film I never really have before, especially in a movie.

INNER HATRED.

I hated myself and all other people who continue to blindly pay and give money to companies who find it not only legal, but morally sound to give an electric shock to these animals, cut off their heads (while awake), slaughter them, peel off their skin, and let their viscera slide down a chute into a large vat.

I realized how those thousands of loyal german citizens felt after WWII, when they were led into Auschwitz, and saw what was hidden from them the whole time.

I cried.

I cried so hard I couldn't help myself.

I felt strange, since I've never cried at a movie (save for "Untamed Heart" when I was eight)
and I wondered why.

For the first time, I realized that I actually cared about it. I was allowing them to kill another living thing, like ME, and serve it to me. How selfish.

I'm never eating meat again. Chicken, steak, hamburger, pork, turkey. ANYTHING.
I've made this decision on my own...and I swear on my life, I'm never gonna break it. EVER.

Thanks for listening to me ramble.
It was much appreciated.

Dementia and Peanut Butter

I'm going nuts.
I'm massively stressing out about switching jobs, going to school full-time, and trying to find someway to make ends meet at home without selling my car, getting rid of internet, and eating my feet for dinner.

I'm so goddamn depressed about all of it. I'm trying so hard to get a passing grade in Anatomy, and Joy seems to get high grades easily. I know she studies hard, but if she can get those great grades by studying just as hard as I am, and I struggle so hard to maintain my 79% average...am I making the wrond decision?

Maybe I was made to stay in the postal service my whole life, listening to fat supervisors tell me to "get to work" and "when there's time for leaning, there's time for cleaning." Living everyday with the same bullshit gossip and high school backstabbing that goes on like clockwork. Maybe I was not supposed to get any better than this.

I have been there for 3 years now...almost EVERY single day, I get someone else asking me about how to do something. What's the protocol? How do I get this receipt out of the backlog and reprint it? How do I process a bulk mailing trust? I KNOW! ASK DANN!

Why? Because I know more than the fucking people who have been there for 25 fucking years. I was called (rather foamingly) an "idiot" today (more than once) for changing the 3-month calender so it doesn't show past months. Now I don't know about you, but when I come into the post office planning when something will arrive or try to find out when I'm coming back from vacation the first thing I ask isn't "What was 3 weeks ago from Wednesday?"


I'm at the end of my rope.

How will I pay for school? Loans? That's only fine until I reach EMU. Once there I need grants or I will be BACK IN DEBT. I just got my credit card bill down from $5,000 to $1,300 in a year. Now I'm gonna go back into debt in amounts almost 5 fold that?

On top of all this, we are way behind in wedding planning. It's not Joy's fault or mine alone. Some of it was laziness. But now it seems like we never have the time to call and get addresses from people, sit down and plan the invitations and get them mailed, plan out the reception, or any of that stuff. I just don't want my wedding to reflect my "try and not succeed" image. I don't want my guests to say "I'd give that wedding a B-"

What do I do?
Shit. I drown in my own self-pity. It's nasty. I guess writing this would assume I want people to read it. I think when I began, I did...but now I'm not so sure. But like Sarah said, you don't filter a blog...you just post it. So here goes.

I Eat the Devil

Today I ate Satan.

Discuss.

Okay, I'm not exactly truthful. I ate Seitan, but it's pronounced the same way. It's some kinda weird protein-ish, kinda faux meat, wheat gluten. When you cook it, it tastes almost exactly like steak, but a little salty.

My fiance is a vegetarian, so we try to find alternatives to meat. Which is fine by me...I don't eat red meat anymore...my only vice is chicken.

CHICKEN IS LIFE.


I could eat it until it slides out of my ears.
What a kodak moment.

The seitan itself was good....but half my baked potato was black with something.
I hope I don't die.

In the beginning, I chose a font.

I finally joined the Spot. Sometimes I wondered if I was ever going to finally get around to it, but it happened.

I chose a font. TREBUCHET.

Why?

Yep. Simply because of the large, hurling weapon used to siege castles.
Great name...font looks like poop, though. It's boring as shit.
Oh well, on to more important matters.