Top 10 Things That Should Cease Next Year

I have compiled a short list of things this year which I hope mankind will leave out of the upcoming '09. Many of them are holiday themed, but this was completely by accident. They're just the ones fresh in my head.

1. Whenever you ask someone the date (asking them for example, "Is today the 10th?) they respond with "All day!" and a dumb little chuckle.

2. When people leave your house or work on New Year's Eve, and they say "See you next year!" Seriously, people. It's really getting old.

3. These stupid hats. You don't look cool.

4. I know it's a religious thing, but if everyone (they say it on the news, too) would stop saying "Peace and everlasting glory be upon him" everytime Muhammad was mentioned, news reports would be a lot shorter.

5. Quit saying "Jesus is the reason for the season". Let's not get into all the pagan roots, the german origin of the Christmas tree, or even the rotation of the Earth's axis...it's a cheesy and hokey saying.

6. This new year, 2009, Americans once again have another chance to start using their goddamn turn signals.

7. No...you are NOT the first person to make the USPS "going postal" joke, and it's still stupid.

8. Depoliticalcorrectnessitization. Put Oscar back in his Garbage can and away from the recycling, let Cookie Monster raid Mrs. Fields, and stop patronizing kids with this hokey Dora the Explorer and the Creepy Dude with the tickle-sword.

9. 3 words: Hanna Montana, Flamethrower.

10. NEW CHRISTMAS SONGS. I don't know about you guys, but I don't "throw on the Yule log", roast chesnuts, toast marshmellons, or tell christmas "ghost stories". Plus, all the religious Xmas songs have 8 verses, all of which say the same thing the previous one did (only using one syllable to say long words like "heav'n" and "glor'yus"). You need songs people can relate to. Create some songs about "Dashing through the Winter Wonderland" in attempt to find a Toys-R-Us that has a Wii.