Boredom is Danngerous

Me.
On lunch.
Bored.




As usual, I'm still awesome.

Top 10 Things That Should Cease Next Year

I have compiled a short list of things this year which I hope mankind will leave out of the upcoming '09. Many of them are holiday themed, but this was completely by accident. They're just the ones fresh in my head.

1. Whenever you ask someone the date (asking them for example, "Is today the 10th?) they respond with "All day!" and a dumb little chuckle.

2. When people leave your house or work on New Year's Eve, and they say "See you next year!" Seriously, people. It's really getting old.

3. These stupid hats. You don't look cool.

4. I know it's a religious thing, but if everyone (they say it on the news, too) would stop saying "Peace and everlasting glory be upon him" everytime Muhammad was mentioned, news reports would be a lot shorter.

5. Quit saying "Jesus is the reason for the season". Let's not get into all the pagan roots, the german origin of the Christmas tree, or even the rotation of the Earth's axis...it's a cheesy and hokey saying.

6. This new year, 2009, Americans once again have another chance to start using their goddamn turn signals.

7. No...you are NOT the first person to make the USPS "going postal" joke, and it's still stupid.

8. Depoliticalcorrectnessitization. Put Oscar back in his Garbage can and away from the recycling, let Cookie Monster raid Mrs. Fields, and stop patronizing kids with this hokey Dora the Explorer and the Creepy Dude with the tickle-sword.

9. 3 words: Hanna Montana, Flamethrower.

10. NEW CHRISTMAS SONGS. I don't know about you guys, but I don't "throw on the Yule log", roast chesnuts, toast marshmellons, or tell christmas "ghost stories". Plus, all the religious Xmas songs have 8 verses, all of which say the same thing the previous one did (only using one syllable to say long words like "heav'n" and "glor'yus"). You need songs people can relate to. Create some songs about "Dashing through the Winter Wonderland" in attempt to find a Toys-R-Us that has a Wii.

A Classic Remade!

Everyone!

Watch this short trailer...good times coming soon!

EUREKA!

Yes!

I've finally started posting stuff that no one gives a shit about!
Oh, wait. That was always the problem.

False alarm.

Reise, Reise (Live)

Another great song, this time live.
I know most of you don't care, but whatever.

Rosenrot

This is the best song. Ever. Hands down.
The chorus is just so catchy.

I'll post the translation of the lyrics below...it helps you understand the point.

"ROSENROT" (Rose Red)

A girl saw a little rose
It bloomed there in bright heights
She asked her sweetheart
if he could fetch it for her

She wants it and that's fine
So it was and so it will always be
She wants it and that's the custom
Whatever she wants she gets

---CHORUS---
Deep wells must be dug
if you want clear water
Rose-red, oh Rose-red
Deep waters don't run still

The boy climbs the mountain in torment
He doesn't really care about the view
Only the little rose is on his mind
He brings it to his sweetheart

She wants it and that's fine
So it was and so it will always be
She wants it and that's the custom
Whatever she wants she gets

(CHORUS)

At his boots, a stone breaks
Doesn't want to be on the cliff anymore
And a scream lets everyone know
Both are falling to the ground

She wants it and that's fine
So it was and so it will always be
She wants it and that's the custom
Whatever she wants she gets

(CHORUS)

This Week, on "The Dann Show"...

This week, Joy and I left for The Martin residence in the far off county of Dexterfordshire to bake Christmas cookies. Megan asked us to "make her a special one". So I had to make it good. I decided on something dashingly clever that Megan would identify with:

"LA!!!!!!!!!!"

Also, a few days ago, while feeling a bit tired and grumpy (not to mention unshaven...ick.), I went into the bathroom and took a cell phone snap of my mug.

You know you want some of this.

So...yeah. That all happened.

...that's it.

A Creepy Poem

Just follow the link. Morbid doesn't quite cut it.

http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/pauline_dual.html

That's Ummm...One Way to Put it.

So, there are many people who do not appreciate Rammstein's music, as I do. However, on YouTube today, I found a hilarious "interpretation" of Du Hast. It's friggin' hysterical and I wanted people to see it.

And in case you're totally lost...no, these are not the actual words.

A Bit from Kafir Girl

I quoted part of Kafir Girl's latest entry...it cracked me up.

"...verse 2 (of Abraham) hints at the terrible punishment that awaits those who doesn’t believe in the book (that wasn’t a book quite yet). Lets fast forward to those verses, shall we?
There are actually some new details in chapter 14 about the doom and gloom you, as a kafir, can expect after death.

Check it out:

(16) Before him is Hell, and he will get putrid liquid to drink.(17) He will sip it, yet will not be able to gulp it down. Death will crowd in upon him from every side, but die he will not. A terrible torment trails him.

Mmmmkay. So in hell, you’ll get a smelly drink that you’ll have to sip instead of gulp. And death will be all around you, only you won’t die. You’ll just sit there, sipping your smelly drink. It won’t be nice. The only thing is, I’ve experienced the whole putrid liquid thing before. I had access to nothing but instant coffee for an entire week, remember? It doesn’t even smell like real coffee. And you have to take little sips of it to keep from gagging on the shame of drinking instant. *Le sigh* I’m still a little bitter, I guess."

Funny shit.

Hitler Wants "A Burger King"

This video cracked me up.
You almost feel sorry for the guy.

p>